Aalana Kane

[QUOTE=CompanionEstella;12009910]I do NOT want to turn this thread into victim blaming/another thread where stalker men obsess over me but I do want to provide a few safety tips, especially in light of the serious victim blaming post earlier.

First, my heart goes out to the original poster and I thank you so much for bringing this to light to better protect other providers. You have done ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG and everything RIGHT in being brave enough to alert other providers to a dangerous individual.

Men who "stealth"/secretly remove condoms are getting better at what they do. It's a disturbing trend that is growing in frequency and they are increasingly using deceptive tactics to get away with this. They will act nice/cool for a period and then pretend to "apologize" for the "accident". A few tips and life lessons learned for any lady to avoid this:

1. If a man mentions BBFS or shows any proclivity to it, immediately kick him out. This includes BBFS requests, complaints about condoms, attempting to begin session without condom, etc. There is something very wrong with men who exhibit this type of behavior and they will not improve. Ensure you have collected and hid the donation beforehand so that they do not have monetary leverage over you. If they show signs of being interested in this sort of thing, remove them. They will not get better, they will only get worse.

2. They have learned to rip the condom at the head so simply checking for the "ring" will not help. If you notice them touch their member AT ALL during sex, take a full pause and do a GOOD check to make sure it has not been tampered with before continuing. In some cases, it may be best to avoid positions from behind with potentially sketchy new men or be extra attentive to where their hands are at all times.

3. When a so called "accident" occurs, they will likely pretend to be apologetic. Alert on them anyway. Do not offer them a reference. They are sometimes getting away with this by pretending it was an accident, which is a key hallmark of stealthing. If they have references on their account and you write a TNA alert, they will have to create a new account and behave themselves for a few sessions before they can do this to another provider, which at least slows them down.

4. For your health/safety, please educate yourself on STI prevention methods like anti-HIV meds like PREP (before accident) and PEP (after accident) and be aware that they can give you shots/medications at doctors to reduce the chances of other STDs as well. Don't forget Plan B as well!

I hope this helps. All my love, ladies![/QUOTE]